Why do I always loose. What can't I just have something good and be able to hang on to it. I'm so sick of feeling like I have no place to go. I loved him so much. With all my heart. Why can't people just be happy for the happiness I had found. I know its time to let him go now but the truth is I don't know if I'm ready for that. I don't know how to let go of him. I don't even know how to fall asleep on my own. Without his sweet words or his beautiful singing voice I don't know if I can continue. I just don't even want to keep going. I just want to sleep. Sleep and sleep and sleep and sleep and never wakeup. That way I don't have to feel like things anymore. I'm so sick of leaving and running away. I'm so hurt though. I don't even know how to begin to heal. All I want to do is hurt. I don't want to be better because that means I will forget and he is the one love that I will never forget.
